Please Dance with Me (Poetry)

BOOM!

The barbed light

pierces the night.

The raindrops braille the dirt.

Like a tree that’s struck

my mind is cracked in two.

“GO AWAY!

NO!!!

PLEASE STAY!!”

Eyes shut, face crumpled,

my mind screaming so loud

I collapse to the ground,

hands covering my ears

to drown out the sound,

that no one else can hear.

On the outside I look fine.

Hair pulled into a ponytail,

face expressionless,

though my eyes are waterlogged,

tired and sore.

The light cracks again,

like a whip slicing my heart.

My body jerks back

with a painful yelp.

I fall halfway down.

I’m on my knees,

back arched.

My eyes to the sky —

The light shows me

all I wish to hide.

What I want to run from:

The emotions I cannot bear

to keep feeling,

to keep living,

to keep experiencing —

Amy, keep breathing.

It’s dark again now.

I am the storm,

so why does it hurt me?

The dark grey clouds cover my mind,

thoughts colliding like sound waves.

Boom! BOOM!

Dissipating with a violent rumble.

My thoughts are my enemy!

How can I harness this energy?

How can I take this electricity,

and re-route it into positivity?

…

I can journal.

I can write.

I can push out truly

terrible rhymes.

I can draw.

I can breathe

until the storm passes

and calm finds its way

back into my chest.

But the storm will come again,

and again

and again.

It will weather me.

The gales, my triggers,

directing my growth

like wind swept trees.

It will teach me

that this is me.

That I can overcome anything

life throws at me.

That I am worthy.

I am worthy of love.

(Just like you)

If not someone else’s, then my own.

I will stand with me in the storm

and maybe one day,

someone will stand with me

unafraid of the chaos I bring,

and we,

we will dance in the rain.

Dance with me,

please dance with me,

and show me that my electricity

is sensuality.

Lightning striking between the sheets

from lust or caress,

a massage to please.

To relax the stress knotted

in your flesh,

my touch is how I show

I care.

As the storms collide

within my mind

I remember your fingers

intertwined with mine.

Dance with me,

please dance with me,

and show me that my thunder

is a bedtime harmony

easing you to sleep.

Dance with me

in the pouring rain,

turn me with a smile

then spin away the pain.

Storms destroy

and storms clear the way.

Storms make us value

the sunny days.