Update on my Health (Dec 18)
Updated: Dec 31, 2020
The TRUE PRESENT this year is that Dr. Gunn, my psychiatrist, has agreed to remove the medication that is causing the Parkinsonism.
More about 'The Present':
This year I decided to take my art back into surrealism. The checkered floor that has appeared in many of 2019’s pieces is representational of the Present Moment.
The Present started as a woman trapped in a box, and then I changed the narrative: She is not trapped, she is being protected. Everything outside of the box is a story. The road behind her is the past, the grass and brick path are the future, while the other visuals are connected to trauma.
This is Peace:
The Present Moment offers my character a safe haven where she can observe the stories without partaking in them. She can access this safe space in many ways, like focusing on her breath or on her physical senses: Taste, Touch, Sight, Sound, & Smell. These types of grounding activities bring her back to the ‘Now’ where she has choices.
Only in the Present Moment does the action of choice exist. It is the only place we can implement it. Once grounded in the 'Now' she can acknowledge that her thoughts are stories. Once she’s able to acknowledge this, she can then detach from the inner narrative. Once detached, she has the power to re-write the stories. Not every story can be re-written however, this is where choice occurs. If she can’t change the story then two other options exist: accept or leave the story.
Practicing being present and mindful has been a powerful mental shift for me. I am by no means perfect at it… But it, alongside the Core Four (Sleep, Food, Movement & Connection) have greatly aided the mental and emotional stability I’ve experienced for well over a year now.