When The Raccoon Became A Mirror

This blog was based on a comment thread that took place on Facebook.

Sometimes I use a laughing emoji to lighten the mood or indicate a dry or awkward laugh—not always because I think something is an “lol 😂 hilarious!!! 🤣🤣🤣” type of funny. A recent example of this was in a comment I replied to where I stated that I would trust a raccoon to eat out of the trash bin—not because it wasn’t trustworthy but because that’s its nature (as it is for any being in survival mode). Originally I wrote “creature” instead of “being” and put a laughing emoji (😅) afterwards, but then I saw my commentary was touching on something deeper.

When people are in survival mode, there’s a natural focus on self-preservation. In that state, we can expect people to do whatever they need to do to survive, which may go beyond seeking food, shelter, or water and into other basic needs such as community, love, touch, or even addictions and substance use. In that state of survival, some people may resort to lying, being manipulative, coercive, threatening, or even violent—anything one needs to do to survive even if that survival is emotional rather than physical.

Human nervous systems evolved to live in community. Feelings of rejection, shame, or abandonment can trigger our brains and bodies to respond as if our survival is at stake. Because of this, many, like myself, who grew up in survival mode, developed harmful ways to stay connected—or stay alive—without realizing those behaviours were rooted in survival. They’re strategies we learned—they’re not who we are.

We don’t know the desperate means any of us may resort to unless it happens, yet history has shown us some horrific examples. During some of the worst famines people have resorted to cannibalism—including consuming the dead, and in some instances, children.

Being in survival mode is not a laughing matter. I added the emoji to lighten the mood as I was originally commenting on raccoons eating out of trash bins (and that I wouldn’t expect them not to). I didn’t fully make the connection of what my commentary was touching upon until later when I changed the wording and then later on still when I chose to remove the laughing emoji. Interestingly enough this blog highlights another comment under that same post where I shared that different words and symbols can mean different things to different people. Although we can choose the words we speak and the emojis we share, we can’t choose how other people interpret them.